Thursday, December 18, 2014

.5 ways to stop being judgmental.

assalamualaikum readers :)

last night, i ate some humble pie. the first slice was early in the morning during 'tanyalah ustazah' show on astro channel 119 and another one that night during 'raikan wanita' on astro maya 135.

why is it that sometimes we tend to judge others so easily? when we see someone, we judge them by the way they dress or talk or any other superficial impressions. sometimes these people are strangers that we come across while buying groceries at the supermarket, for instance. or someone much closer to heart.

it is wrong in so many ways when we do so. when i do so. a few hours ago, when i saw someone blocked a road lane with her car to tend to her business, my mind started to make assumptions. like "orang kaya suka hati tak ikut peraturan" or "ignorant ________" fill in the blank yourself. yeah, what she did was wrong; causing a mini traffic jam or possible hazard to an accident. but it doesn't give me the right to judge. before my mind went wild and words came out of my mouth, i stopped myself and istighfar.

tak pasal-pasal dapat dosa nanti kan?
bila nak ada peluang minta maaf dengan ahkak tu?

the lovely ustazah on channel 119,
mentioned that (in my own words):

always pray to Allah swt to soften our hearts,
so that we won't be
bad-tempered and foul-mouthed.

don't simply judge others as we ourselves are not perfect.

to be khusyuk in solat,
learn to understand the verses
and surah that we are reciting.
the compassionate vivy yusof on 'raikan wanita'
said that (in my own words):

we can be successful if we try hard
and not just feel envious of others' success.

the true meaning of success is to enter Jannah
and having all her loved ones with her.

*put icon menangis here*

the next day, vivy 'gave' me this. tee hee

their encouragement and advice are simple and direct, i know.
(may Allah swt bless both of them)
but can i achieve all that?
am i worthy of such hope?
are you judging me right now?
hah gotcha!

so, here are 5 ways to stop being judgmental when we see someone:

1. if you find yourself starting to judge, istighfar cepat cepat.
2. put yourself in their shoes, "if i'm him/her, why did i...."
3. hum the song 'man in the mirror' like a background pick-me-up song for your own life story.
4. pinch yourself. anywhere that is fleshy. under the arm is preferable and suitable for situations that might occur in public places.
5. avert your eyes towards somewhere/someone else. if you start to judge again, go back to number 1.

okay. selamat beramal kawan-kawan!

p/s: this is very important, dear readers. i've learnt my lesson when i lost a friend because of my words. need to filter our thoughts before our mouth takes over. even when the thought seem sooo right at the moment and has a positive outcome in our mind. others might not see it as we do.
thank you for reading!

1 comment:

atuk_amn said...

setuju :)....mak ni :))))